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Setting Healthy Boundaries

To Boost Self-Esteem and Self-Worth

Setting Healthy Boundaries is a helpful tool to improve self-esteem and self-worth. This worksheet is designed to be reflective, engaging, and easy to follow, helping you understand boundaries and how to set them confidently.

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This worksheet provides a structured approach to understand and practice setting boundaries, which can improve your self-esteem and reinforce a strong sense of self-worth.

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Part 1: Understanding Boundaries

What Are Boundaries?
Boundaries are the limits and rules we set for ourselves in relationships and situations. They help us feel safe, respected, and valued. Healthy boundaries are essential for self-esteem and self-worth because they affirm our needs and values.

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Why Boundaries Matter
Boundaries are key to maintaining healthy relationships with ourselves and others. Setting and respecting boundaries can:

  • Improve confidence

  • Reduce stress

  • Increase self-respect and respect from others

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Types of Boundaries
Take a moment to reflect on the different types of boundaries:

  • Physical: Personal space, touch, and physical needs

  • Emotional: How much emotional energy we give and receive

  • Time: How we spend our time, both professionally and personally

  • Intellectual: Our thoughts, opinions, and beliefs

  • Material: Possessions, finances, and how we share resources

Part 2: Reflection

Self-Reflection on Current Boundaries
Think about your current boundaries. Do you feel that your boundaries are respected by others? Are there areas where you feel overextended, uncomfortable, or undervalued?

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  • Physical Boundaries:

Example Reflection: "I feel uncomfortable when someone stands too close, but I don’t say anything."

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  • Emotional Boundaries:

Example Reflection: "I often feel drained after listening to others' problems."

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  • Time Boundaries:

Example Reflection: "I take on extra work even when I'm already busy."

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  • Intellectual Boundaries:

Example Reflection: "I hesitate to express my opinions if I think others may disagree."

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  • Material Boundaries:

Example Reflection: "I lend my belongings to others even when I feel reluctant."

Part 3: Identifying Personal Needs and Values

What Do You Need to Feel Respected and Valued?
Reflect on situations when you felt respected and valued, and consider what made you feel that way. List 3–5 personal needs or values that you want others to respect.

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Example: "I need time alone to recharge after social events."​

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Example: "I value honesty and clear communication."

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How Do Your Needs and Values Align with Your Current Boundaries?
Think about whether you’ve been able to set boundaries that align with your needs and values. Which boundaries are working well, and which need improvement?

Part 4: Practicing Setting Boundaries

Steps to Communicate Your Boundaries
Practicing clear communication can help reinforce healthy boundaries. Here’s a simple framework:

  • Identify the boundary you need to set.

  • Use "I" statements to express your needs.

  • Stay firm but kind in your delivery.

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Example Script:

  • “I feel more comfortable when I have my own space. Can we sit a little further apart?”

  • “I appreciate you coming to me with your concerns, but I need some time to process my own feelings before we talk.”

 

Role-Playing or Journaling Practice
Try writing down or role-playing a scenario in which you set a boundary. Reflect on how you feel after expressing this boundary. This can help build confidence and make setting boundaries more natural.

Part 5: Boundaries in Action – Setting Boundaries in Daily Life

Boundary-Building Challenge

For the next week, set one boundary each day. These can be small, like deciding not to answer non-urgent texts right away or requesting alone time for a few minutes each day. Reflect on how each boundary affects your self-esteem, energy, and stress levels.​​

 

Reflecting on Progress

At the end of the week, answer the following:

  • What was the hardest boundary to set?

  • How did setting a boundary make you feel about yourself?

  • What positive effects did you notice?

Part 6: Support and Accountability

Who Can Help You?
Setting boundaries can be challenging, especially at first. Identify supportive people in your life who can encourage you to stick to your boundaries.

 

Example: "My friend Sam supports my boundaries by encouraging me to take time for myself."

 

Remind Yourself of Your Worth
Use affirmations to remind yourself why boundaries are important for your self-esteem and self-worth. Some examples include:

  • "I am worthy of respect and care."

  • "My needs are important."

  • "Setting boundaries helps me take care of myself."

Reflection and Growth

Consider any insights you've gained from this worksheet. What can you do going forward to continue setting boundaries that support your self-esteem and self-worth?

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